Feminism Fail? Really?

[sparkfrost]

So, occasionally on Fandom!Secrets there will be a secret saying that the OP wants to "hit" some character, but OH NOES! They're total jerks and players and misogynists and how COULD SHE want to hit that, totally FEMINISM FAIL!

Really? Really, OP? Just because you find someone hot you fail as a feminist? Now, correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't feminism the idea that women are equal to men and therefore deserve equal treatment? So, you like a character because he's hot and you want to do him. That character sleeps with women because they're hot and he wants to do them. Seems pretty equal to me!

Honestly, that sort of attitude pisses me off, because it seems more like a failure of feminism than wanting to sleep with an asshole. Guys admit attraction to women they find despicable all the time. I mean, there is a reason that the femme fatale is such a popular literary character, so why do women get all upset when they find themselves attracted to a villain? That seems like more of a double standard to me- guys are allowed to find evil people hot and want to sleep with them, but then again, guys are dogs, right? Whereas us women are sugar and spice and everything nice and we always have to be attracted to the clean-shaven, polo shirt wearing good guy, otherwise its... feminism fail? Now I've just confused myself. Explain how that works exactly? Oh, wait, you can't, because it doesn't make sense.

So lets go over this again. It is OK to be attracted to assholes. Really! James Kirk is a womanizing son of a bitch, but hot damn is he hot. Brendon Urie? Probably a dick! But I'd still hit it. (Well, I would if he weren't like, two feet shorter than me.) Hugh Grant cheated on Elizabeth Hurley with a transsexual prostitute, yet he still stars in romantic comedies and gets girls' panties wet. (If my language offends you, feel free to clutch those pearls) But do you see what I mean? Just because someone is a dick doesn't mean that you're a failure of a feminist for being attracted to him. It means that they are good looking, or charismatic, or say "hello" in a way that makes you want to strip to your skivvies and have a heavy petting session on your couch. Whatever floats your boat!

But basically, stop saying that you fail as a feminist over something as silly and inconsequential as physical attraction. Its not a political statement, its hormones for fucks sake. Chill!

Comments

[ficsoreal.livejournal.com]

Lol. Word.

[sparkfrost.livejournal.com]

I <3 this comment. :)

[droewyn.livejournal.com]

New Fanfic-Movie nonwithstanding, I've never found Kirk to be particularly assholish.

[sparkfrost.livejournal.com]

I was indeed referring to the new movie, because that is what the Fandom Secret referred to. I know Shatner's Kirk wasn't a dick, but he was a... "ladies man" to put it delicately. :)

[sinuous-curve.livejournal.com]

\o/

I love everything this post chooses to be.

[sparkfrost.livejournal.com]

Thank you! :D

[nomoreuturns.livejournal.com]

Yes, this. That's why I think Gaila is awesome...she had to know about Kirk's love-'em-and-leave-'em rep, but she hit that anyway, because that boy is damn fine. And if a guy can do it, why can't a girl? Grr-argh. *frustrated/zombie noises*

[sparkfrost.livejournal.com]

Exactly! It is ok to have sex with someone because you're attracted to them, it really is!

[notsolaconic.livejournal.com]

i'll never get why guys are allowed to fuck whomever they want whenever they want, but when we do it it's dirty, bad, or wrong. or "unfeminist". i don't argue about it often, though, because people's opinions on this subject are almost always disgustingly misogynistic. it's like, okay, believe what you want. i'll just be over here, having fun.

[sparkfrost.livejournal.com]

Yes! I hate that double standard. If guys do it, they're players. If girls do it, they're sluts. Bullshit. I'll be over here, having premarital sex with my boyfriend. Hope that doesn't offend anyone! :-P

[ernestinewalker.livejournal.com]

Seriously! Sex is just animal instincts, hormones, and that magic click you get when you realise YOU WANT THAT. Who cares who wants what? If someone said, "I want to eat a salad," no one would give a shit. But "I want to have hot hate sex in a restaurant bathroom with Tony Bourdain, possibly suspended from the automatic rolling towel dispenser, but definitely enough that the auto-flush jams" and all of a sudden they're a magic tramp.

Just sayin'.

[sparkfrost.livejournal.com]

Tony Bourdain, eh? Interesting...

Um, I mean, yes! Thank you for agreeing! :-P

[ernestinewalker.livejournal.com]

Er, well, y'know... anyone could be put in there. Erm, shit, that sounds a lot worse than, erm...

Right. Yeah. You're totally right.

[forcedmovement.livejournal.com]

I WANT TO GIVE YOU A DELICIOUS PIE EVERY TIME YOU MAKE ONE OF THESE AWESOME, SMART ENTRIES. Which is often, btw. ♥ Sometimes people are just hot, even when they're completely shitty. (Actually, that combination goes hand in hand all too often.) And then, what, we should feel bad for having eyes? jfc.

[sparkfrost.livejournal.com]

Om nom nom, pie!

And yeah, I just don't see the problem with being attracted to an ass. Sure, you might not want to get in a relationship with one, but there is a big difference between saying someone is hot and planning on spending the rest of your life with them.

[soleta-nf.livejournal.com]

Agreed! Excellent points.

[sparkfrost.livejournal.com]

Thank you! (I love your icon!)

[soleta-nf.livejournal.com]

The Twilight one? Thanks! Feel free to steal (credit's in my userinfo). The quote's by cleolinda.

[sparkfrost.livejournal.com]

This one is also excellent! I'm assuming the quote is from cleolinda's write-ups of Twilight? So damn funny, I can't even deal.

[soleta-nf.livejournal.com]

Yes, either from the write-ups or in one of her stories about talking to her mother about Twilight, I think. I love the story how Cleo had warned her mother about the plot!fail of the last book, and when her mom finished the book, her mom was all smiley and relieved that the plot hadn't gone where she thought it would. And Cleo mentioned baby/werewolf, asking if the mom was okay with that, and her mom said yes, and Cleo was shocked -- until her mom revealed that she'd mistakenly thought that *Edward* fell in love with his own daughter in the last book, and so she was relieved that hadn't actually come to pass. Hee.

[soleta-nf.livejournal.com]

Oh, nevermind. The Spock one. Also stealable. By grrliz.

[sparkfrost.livejournal.com]

He's just so pretty with the makeup and all! :D

[soleta-nf.livejournal.com]

He really is! I think there needs to be a Quinto matching one!