sparkfrost | (no subject)

(no subject)

My houseguest is abusing me.

Chief weapons: Surprise, fear, ruthless efficiency... and some other stuff as well.

I've got soft cushions and a comfy chair!

I think I'm more terrified by the "some other stuff as well" because the unknown quantity is FUCKING HORRIFYING!

You should be terrified. It's so scary I don't dare to tell you what it is.

Also, we've got Loki working for us, and that should up the paranoia for you.

Oh, please. Loki loves me and would never betray me! It helps that I control his food supply.

Got a squirrel on the inside. Been helping, and watching you in the night.

The squirrels are always watching.

...oh no. You've gotten to the squirrel that lives inside my air conditioning! I'M DOOMED!

THAT'S IT! I'M MOVING, CHANGING MY NUMBER, DYEING MY HAIR, AND FAKING MY DEATH!

Gotten to. Gotten to? Darling, we put him there!

And could you go sort of blue tint when you dye your hair? I've always thought you'd look sexy as a blue head.

The color of my hair won't matter, because I'll be DEAD!

Oh like THAT'S going to stop us. I mean really!

Until you gain a copy of the Necronomicon, I will rest easy in my grave.

Got it on order from Amazon.

DAMNIT!

Oh sweety, you wouldn't have rested in your grave anyway. We'd have dug you up no matter what.

I know. But let me have my delusions of a peaceful afterlife, yeah?

Welll...

Okay, just this once!

Pretty please? *bats eyes*

For you babe, anything.

Thank you darlin!

*goes to r.i.p. for a little while*

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